Attention Citizens!!!!!

submitted by trident765 from self.Coronavirus

I saw this comment on Youtube:

Attention Citizens!!!!! Report immediately to the nearest staging area for the monthly injection of the cure for the monthly variant. Bring your passport which will be updated along with your improved social credit score at time of injection. Remember Citizens, Big Brother loves and cares about you and you must report anyone that resists the cure. A social credit score bonus of 5 points will be yours for every resistor you identify!

all 9 comments
sorted by:
top
newinsightfulfun

[–]thefirststone 7 insightful - 6 fun7 insightful - 5 fun8 insightful - 6 fun -  (1 child)

You can tell this will never happen because we don't live in 1984.

Now, consumer, take your Pfizer™Soma®, proud sponsor of Disney®™©CapeShitⓈⓄⓎ

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Soma has kind of an interesting history. Although it shares the name, the real life soma is a muscle relaxer that I'm pretty sure was abused mostly because of the name. It does potentiate opiates, but so do all muscle relaxers. Still, as a sought after substance it became the only muscle relaxer to be scheduled as a controlled substance.

[–]infocom6502 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

what about mandatory vitamin D level testing?

[–]Brewdabier 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (5 children)

And I turn lead into gold for only $25 KG.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

I'll take two please.

[–]Brewdabier 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

2 KG, wonderful. Just send the lead to California Governor's Office with Obama notes or 911 notes

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

It'd make more sense if you sourced the lead locally, shipping 2 kilos back and forth will add unnecessarily to the overhead.

[–]Brewdabier 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I see why over on reddit you must state "sarcasm", it's for people like you.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

You mean.... You lied to me!!!? What am I going to do with all these 911 dollars now?