Bisexual TERFs?

submitted by Rage-Xion from self.GenderCritical

Hello, I have a question. We talk a lot about lesbians who are shamed for not sleeping with transwomen but I also wonder if there are bisexual women who wouldn't date trans people and are shamed for it? Do you know or meet them?

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[–]Irascible-harpy 13 insightful - 2 fun13 insightful - 1 fun14 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

I'm bi and wouldn't date a trans person. I had a woke friend get huffy about this once, but I've been in a relationship forever and live in a pretty right wing area so it doesn't come up much except for online. I do see the odd post from lesbians saying to transwomen "just date a bisexual", and that makes me roll my eyes. No thanks!

[–]lefterfield 10 insightful - 3 fun10 insightful - 2 fun11 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

No one should be pressured into dating mentally ill narcissists.

[–]censorshipment 5 insightful - 8 fun5 insightful - 7 fun6 insightful - 8 fun -  (0 children)

The febfem subreddit was banned due to their connection to the LGBDropTheT sub (same head mod). Febfem stands for female-exclusive bisexual female, excluding anyone born male, and only dating women.

One of my best friends is a febfem. We met 15 years ago when she had a boyfriend. She developed a crush on me, dumped him and has not dated a man since 2006. Lol so proud of her!

[–][deleted] 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I see a lot of "my partner is trans and i'm still with them because i'm bi/i won't mind if my partner comes out as trans cus im bi" and it annoys me to no end, like it's expected from us to keep dating someone after they come out as trans, as if they magically become the opposite sex instead of cheap imitations with loads of unsolved mental problems.

Nah, I wouldn't stay with a man that comes out as trans. Not only these guys tend to be very narcissistic and full of weird fetishes (my personal experience with many TIM ex-friends), they never look like women except hidden behind filters and weird angles. I also want nothing to do with a person that thinks it's alright spend thousands on unnecessary cosmetic surgeries.

Now, I'm a lot more sympathetic to TIFs and I did date some, but I guess these days if I'm dating a woman that doesn't identify as a woman anymore, even if she doesn't change anything, this is a deal breaker for me.

I identified as trans for the longest time and I remember how much gender politics made me depressed. My life revolved around that, I had no personality besides being trans, everything else came second. The "euphoria" you feel after figuring out you're trans vanishes as fast as it hits, then you're depressed again for the most part and don't know what is wrong.

I have my own mental health to care about and I wouldn't mind dating someone with similar experiences (ptsd, depression, etc), but trans people seem to think being trans solves all their problems and their life is falling apart because of other people, not because they're sick. I don't need someone like that when I'm trying to get better.

Of course, I don't talk about not being into trans people in woke circles, because that will grant me the biggest "stfu terf" and people trying to explain to me why I can't have boundaries.

[–]grixit 6 insightful - 4 fun6 insightful - 3 fun7 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

I like bananas and i like tomatoes. But not together, yuck!

[–]milknciggies 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I was one, I guess. I felt pressured because if I like men and I like women, then what's wrong with being with a "girl with a dick" or a "man with a pussy"? Best of both worlds, right??
So when asked I used to respond that I would be open to the idea, and the reaction was that well duh, of course if you like both... But when I realised I am not attracted to trans individuals in the slightest, people just couldn't wrap their head around it. And I did feel kinda guilty and confused for a while.
I mean, if I like both separately, what's wrong with having both at the same time? Well, I don't need to justify my preferences to anyone but the way I feel about it (putting aside ideology) is that there's something that makes my brain hurt when I think about a "woman" with male genitals and viceversa. It's some sort of uncanny valley feeling that I find quite unpleasant.
Also, during this time of "questioning" I became curious about post-op genitals so I started googling images, videos and read about it and was completely horrified. Those neo-genitals were nothing like what the TRAs and woke allies would lead me to believe. That they are just like the real thing.
So in the end, I decided that post-op trans people were off the table, no matter how "open-minded" I wanted to be, and shortly after realised that trans people in general weren't appealing to me.
Luckily, I was never directly pressured or in any uncomfortable situations that would've led me to have sex with a trans person.

[–]TurtleFuzz 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I'm happily married and have a family but I would not date a trans person, TIM or TIF. Having children was important to me, and I am not attracted to trans genitals. And it'snot a "preference", because plastic surgery genitals are completely different from natal genitals.

I tried explaining this to a SuperStraightphobe on peddit, and he took screenshots of our conversation, didn't blank out my name, and posted them with the title "SHAME, SHAME, SHAME". Yes, this guy was very mature.

Luckily the SuperStraightPhobic sub was shuttered for hate speech a day later, so it was a win for me. But yeah, the trans will use any shaming tactic they can to coerce people into fucking them.

[–]Aloudmeow 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I’m bi and am vehemently for the definition of woman meaning adult human female. A man cannot “become” or “be” a woman. I’m married but would never date a transperson.