Picture a white morbidly obese middle aged gay neckbeard ginger gamer. A living stereotype. He smokes, has stained teeth, and stinks. Has dandruff and bad skin but does nothing about either. Has a literal neckbeard he doesn’t maintain. Sleeps on a bare mattress and hardly ever washes the bedding he does have. His room is a pigsty with piles of dirty laundry, trash, and dirty dishes. Even his jeep is so full of trash that there’s nowhere to sit in the back.
And then he whines about how he can’t get a boyfriend. It’s a mystery! On top of this, despite his liberal views he is skeptical of feminism and has zero understanding of or interest in it.
So a couple weeks ago he tells me that he wants to be a woman. That he thinks he is a woman.
Um… What? I know this man very well. He ain't no woman. I tried to be as nice as possible. I told him that “being” a woman takes a lot of WORK, that his zero-effort bachelor lifestyle is OK for a man but won't cut it for a woman. But he seems to think that a woman is just something that you “are” if you think you are. When I tried to tell him that being a woman is harder than it looks, he didn’t seem to understand. (Could that be because he’s... not a fucking woman? Nah...)
I thought I was pro-trans until that moment. I imagined TIMs as people who understand women and want to put in the work to become one. But I learned instantly that that is not the case. I’m secretly angry about it. If that lazy trashy neckbeard can be a woman… then.. IDK. IDK what to say. I’m not saying that housekeeping and grooming make women women, but the expectations are so much higher. Repressively so. How can someone who lives in filth say he “feels like a woman?” What does he even think a woman is? What level of success does he even expect to have as a fat smelly TIM? And so, that's how I ended up here on Saidit.
He hasn't tried transitioning yet, but I don't know if that's because he's too lazy to do anything to change or because he realized he was wrong. Either way, he hasn't admitted anything.
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