all 20 comments

[–]just_lesbian_things 45 insightful - 2 fun45 insightful - 1 fun46 insightful - 2 fun -  (4 children)

I'm obviously of the belief that people should be able to date whoever the want without discrimination as long as it doesn't disempower the label they are associating themselves with

I'm not going to tell lesbians they can't date men. I'm going to tell women who want to date men that they can't be lesbians. I'm not policing attraction, I'm policing labels.

Male trans people are men and female trans people are women. Pretending otherwise is what got us into this mess in the first place.

[–]reluctant_commenter 34 insightful - 2 fun34 insightful - 1 fun35 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

I'm not going to tell lesbians they can't date men. I'm going to tell women who want to date men that they can't be lesbians.

This. Thank you. That's a great way to put it.

I was told the other day by someone that she had a friend who was a "lesbian who is married to a man and in love with a man". I told her that person is not a lesbian, even if she feels like it, and that the rest of the world would call her bisexual.

Then we had a 20 minute conversation about what "reality" is. She was trying to argue to me that "this person's reality is that she is a lesbian" and I was like, "That may be how she sees the world but it does not match objective reality." If I perceive myself as having an extra eyeball, that's cool, but it doesn't mean I have one.

Sorry for the rant lol, it upset me.

[–]LasagnaRossa 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Then we had a 20 minute conversation about what "reality" is.

I had so many conversations with religious people about what reality is. They always use this excuse when they can't demonstrate what they believe in.

Odd how a TRA used the same argument, isn't it?

[–]reluctant_commenter 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

YYYYYEP. I was actually just thinking the other day about how TRAs remind me of Christian fundamentalists.

[–]LasagnaRossa 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

They have it all, especially the shunning for wrongthink

[–]haveanicedaytoo💗💜💙 28 insightful - 1 fun28 insightful - 0 fun29 insightful - 1 fun -  (8 children)

A romance with a person like this is impossible. They don't see you as a human. They just see you as a tool for their "narcissistic supply." They live in a fantasy world where they are the smartest, most important person in the world, and if you are under their control, they will force you to live in this fantasy world with them and gaslight you and torture you and punish you anytime you try to go back to reality. This fantasy world is their coping mechanism, and you and your feelings don't matter. Your life and your happiness and your mental/physical/emotional needs do not matter. You are just a tool to help keep the fantasy going. If you dare to say "But what about me?" they will call you a selfish asshole and run around complaining to the whole world about you and lie and do a smear campaign to destroy you. Because not only do they not love you or care about you, you mean so little to them, that they would actually enjoy getting the chance to destroy you. It would give them the feeling of power.

And LGB who instinctively get red flag feelings about people like this are gaslit and told they are horrible transphobes for not giving trans people a chance at love uwu. I'm not saying all trans people are narcissistic sociopaths, they aren't. But when an LGB person feels that red flag, whether it end up being true or not, the LGB person should be told to trust their gut and not date that person. But our society suckled on the teat of Rape Culture, so we can't have nice things, like autonomy over who we want to date.

[–]reluctant_commenter 16 insightful - 2 fun16 insightful - 1 fun17 insightful - 2 fun -  (6 children)

And LGB who instinctively get red flag feelings about people like this are gaslit and told they are horrible transphobes for not giving trans people a chance at love uwu. I'm not saying all trans people are narcissistic sociopaths, they aren't.

I think it is fair to say that while not all trans people are narcissists, the transgender ideology is narcissistic. And by trans ideology I mean the "gender is innate and sex isn't real", etc. ideology, not the concept of transexuals.

[–]haveanicedaytoo💗💜💙 18 insightful - 1 fun18 insightful - 0 fun19 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

I don't want to sound like a conspiracy theorist, but I try to imagine how all of this even happened. Like all these anonymous narcissists around the world joined forces through the internet and created this alternate reality together where men are women and women are men and you can get anyone to sleep with you by calling them a transphobe, and the whole world is just going along with it. The whole ideology IS narcissistic because it was hand-crafted by narcissists. It's just mind-boggling to me because it seems like the sort of thing where anyone with a brain would just stand up and say "Now, wait a minute here... This is all crazy!" but nobody is doing it. (WE are, but nobody is listening to us. In fact, Reddit, that enabler scum, silenced us!)

And it reminds me so much of IRL families with an NPD disordered person. Everyone just sits by silently and lets the narcissist destroy everything because everyone is too scared to do anything. And the children/adults who try to escape or fight back are villainized by everyone. It's so horrifying to experience this same dynamic on such a large scale.

[–]reluctant_commenter 16 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 0 fun17 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I don't want to sound like a conspiracy theorist, but I try to imagine how all of this even happened. Like all these anonymous narcissists around the world joined forces through the internet

There is actually peer-reviewed research on this.

"Adolescents tend to associate with friends who have similar levels of psychopathy and friends engage in antisocial behavior (including substance abuse) together [39]. Psychopathy is associated with more reciprocated relationships in male adolescents, and does not affect levels of perceived support in relationships."

Psychopathic individuals are friends with other individuals who also have higher-than-average levels of psychopathic traits.

Source: https://www.intechopen.com/books/psychopathy-new-updates-on-an-old-phenomenon/the-impact-of-psychopathy-on-the-family

The whole ideology IS narcissistic because it was hand-crafted by narcissists. 

Completely agree.

"Now, wait a minute here... This is all crazy!"

I think more people would agree if they knew, but currently, LGB are being used as a scapegoat by TQ and people who are straight don't have the energy or desire, largely, to figure out who is right. They are lucky in that regard.

And it reminds me so much of IRL families with an NPD disordered person. Everyone just sits by silently and lets the narcissist destroy everything because everyone is too scared to do anything. And the children/adults who try to escape or fight back are villainized by everyone. It's so horrifying to experience this same dynamic on such a large scale.

Yeah. Describe my life for me, hahaha. You are correct. I take it you also have some experience with this. :)

[–]haveanicedaytoo💗💜💙 8 insightful - 2 fun8 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

I take it you also have some experience with this. :)

Unfortunately. That's why it's so easy to recognize!

Thanks for that link, I love when ideas I pull out of my butt end up having some scientific merit!

[–]reluctant_commenter 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Unfortunately. That's why it's so easy to recognize!

Yeeeep.

No problem!

[–][deleted] 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

As someone who's parents are both NPD this resonates too much....

[–]writerlylesbian 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

What I always say on this is that the trans movement is founded on a lot of abusive tactics - breaking boundaries, bullying, gaslighting, manipulation etc. - so as a movement it is naturally going to attract abusers who feel at home enacting all of these things. I don't think its a conspiracy exactly, but it's certainly a natural and logical consequence of how the movement is set up.

[–]InLaymansterms 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

From my experience seeing this happen in other peoples relationships with a T, their break up usually ends with the T having a meltdown and creating a witchhunt against the actual gay person. I’ve seen students literally get kicked out of the college I went to and it’s frustrating because if you try to support them, you only get caught in the crossfire too.

[–]zerosis 25 insightful - 1 fun25 insightful - 0 fun26 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I relate to you 100 percent as a gay man who fought for years and lost his entire family because I refused to 're-condition' myself to date women. This whole thing is just insane to me. I'm being told by my friends IRL that I and every other gay man need to start re-examining our sexual preferences, and I just... I honestly can't believe it's come to this. I'm absolutely disgusted by this new attitude in the gay comunity. We don't need to change ourselves. We just don't. We're fine the way we are, as gay people. When the fuck did it turn into this. I can't even really articulate or explain to other people how deeply this affects me and the pain that it's causing. I really feel like I'm losing my community and my identity is being forcibly ripped away from me.

[–]denverkrisMy pronouns are Vodka?/Yes!/please 17 insightful - 1 fun17 insightful - 0 fun18 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I'm glad there's someone else who's just as fucking confused as I am. In addition to watching the harassment of lgb people that I thought we had finally overcome, I now also get to see men winning in women's fucking sporting competitions. The world has lost its mind.

[–]haveanicedaytoo💗💜💙 6 insightful - 2 fun6 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Instead of gay men reconditioning themselves to date straight women, (the FTM gai boi uwus) why can't the straight women recondition themselves to date straight men?

[–]notdelusionalbased faggot 18 insightful - 1 fun18 insightful - 0 fun19 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

eliminate sex-based attraction

This won't happen.

I brand myself as a 'transphobe' simply because the word has no meaning

I'm anti-transgenderism. Transgenderism is a destructive concept. Too many people are taking a "live and let live" approach on this thing. There's a problem when letting live means you don't also get the live along with it. No to the preferred pronoun game. No to compelled thought or speech. No to promoting delusions. Yes to nothing but the truth.

[–]SedateApe 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

If trans people are so "datable" why aren't other trans people snapping them all up?

Once we finally have our own LGB Alliance type organization here in the US one fight I wanna see is new laws where verbally pushing a gay person (or straight) into a trans relationship/sex becomes a crime.

And also any of these "surprise I'm trans" sexual encounters should be charged as attempted sexual assault, if not attempted rape by deception.

The one thing we all, as LGB people, have to remember is that an EXTREMELY HUGE number of trans people have NOT had bottom surgery! Like 90 to 95% have NOT. So there's a large chance that any "transbian" is still swinging his cock and balls. Same with the trans "man" who still has a vagina while wanting to be received as a "gay man." The equipment on trans people isn't what a gay person wants.

And for those that have had the bottom surgery it's fake! No amount of money can make a female out of a male body, or a male out of a female body. Not yet anyway.

And don't even get me started on gay history 😵

[–]jjdub7TERF (Trans Exterminating Reactionary Fascist) 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

between the TRAs telling LGB we're required to fuck people of the opposite sex and BLM protests blocking roads...like how did you think this was supposed to win support for your cause again?