all 19 comments

[–]yousaythosethings 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I feel you. I’m far from a Trump supporter. I’m liberal but I’m in the closet amongst gay friends and most of my liberal friends as being against genderism. I feel like I’m taking crazy pills on a daily basis and suffering each and every time I want to but feel like I can’t speak up and ask friends some pointed questions or point out things and get their reaction. It’s isolating.

Funny enough one of the only people I can talk to about this is my straight male Trump-supporting friend.

And I would have a hard time being ina relationship with anyone who supported genderism. It would be a total value mismatch and probably a mutual lack of respect.

[–]Aurelius[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Thanks for your input. I see that Trump is doing a lot of good for america, and is not what the public smear campaign tells us to think. That mixed with my being broken, unable to make or maintain friends, living alone is just really doing me in. Dating is not in my future, I've only managed one night stands, making me feel like a ''fuckboi''' or something. I was just really wanting to touch someone.

I just work, read, sleep, work, read, sleep. Study buddhism and meditate when I can. Draw when I'm motivated, but I can't socialize. I am a leftover core without much to offer waiting until my breaths stop at last.

Growing up, the lesbians I knew in person were the least helpful people I ever knew. I asked them how I can talk to girls or flirt with them. They said I'll figure it out and that was it, got annoyed when I inquired further. I sought online for ideas and tried them out, feeling silly. But I am broken inside, mental, unstable.

There's nothing left. I feel helpless and small, drowned out by days melting together. I can't live like this. I can't. When the sun comes up again to clear away the mist, I'll go back to being in the dark.

[–]TalerTest 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Why do you feel a need to take any side? I find that it's much simpler to live without being attached to any political group or movement. That way, you can just express your views individually instead of being automatically associated with ideals that you don't support. Plus, its easy to feel indifferent to all the hate being thrown around when you're just a spectator.

[–]Aurelius[S] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I had no intention of taking sides, I just went to the LGBT club, did karaoke, went to BDSM clubs to meet people and learn what I can. On Plenty of Fish, I was called a TERF, didn't know what it was. The transwomen friends I met at the clubs tried to set me up to a blind date. Someone said they had a weird feeling about it, they were setting me up with a transwoman. I declined and they shit talked me behind my back.

Same thing has happened to online communities. I started reading, researching. I am facinated about what's going on. Trump is doing wonderful things for Americans, our economy, safety, etc. I see this, but I still try to be friends on all sides. I just hate hearing people hating women, whites, hating humans, hating america or hating in general. I'm facinated, watching current events unfold. I wish I can tear myself away and only focus on my buddhist studies. Maybe that's what makes me weak.

In any case, thank you kindly for your response. I am snapped, and as I mentioned when the sun returns I'll go back to being in the shadows, not to bother you fine people. I am nothing, nothing, nothing.

[–][deleted] 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (9 children)

Anyone still supporting Trump deserves to feel isolated and all your histrionic posts on the forum won't change that.

[–][deleted]  (4 children)

[deleted]

    [–][deleted] 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

    It's in no way hypocritical. I believe you should have the right to say anything you want and I believe everyone has the right to dislike you for it. Trump supporters deserve the shame they get.

    You are free to dislike me.

    [–]Aurelius[S] 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

    My point of view is that the democrats are the ones being manipulative, the CCP is trying to take advantage of america, sex trafficking was rampant, and mexican drug cartels came and left too freely, selling fentanyl and drugs and abusing immigrants who paid the drug cartel to smuggle them in. I watch things like Tim Pool on youtube and other sources to show how badly the media manipulates things.

    I don't see the evil in Trump that you do that would cause me to be shamed by this side of the lesbian community. I see that he's doing a lot of good, and I see that there's very little proof to show that he's the bad person that the MSM is trying to show him to be. I see someone who loves our country and wants to improve it, and democratic news sources doing dirty tricks to make him look bad and Harris/Biden to look good.

    [–]windrunner 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

    I see that there's very little proof to show that he's the bad person that the MSM is trying to show him to be.

    I agree with what kindofdonetbh said about liberty of speech but I also agree with what pixels said about Trump supporters deserving the shame they get. If you don't see anything wrong with that man after everything he's said and done SPECIALLY TO WOMEN in his miserable life then you're part of the problem and you're purposely blind to it and being a lesbian doesn't absolve you of being a bigot.

    [–]Aurelius[S] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

    I was isolated when my mom was passed out drunk, her teeth rotted out from her binging. I was isolated when I hid from my abusive step dad, mom too withdrawn to comfort me. I was isolated when neglection as an infant made me strange and stutter at students at school. I became more isolated when living in a homeless shelter from violence twice, and my mom refused to pick me up.

    Isolation is all I know, it's all I deserve. Thank you for your input, cherie. May you have a blessed day.

    [–][deleted] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

    Please see the part about your histrionic posts not changing that. This is manipulative behavior.

    [–]Aurelius[S] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

    I'm sorry for appearing like I'm trying to manipulate people. I'm just depressed and unhinged right now. I don't understand what about my post history that bothers you, but I've upset you and I'm sorry for that.

    [–]Aurelius[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

    It's okay, I really only deserve scorn. If I was strong like normal people I wouldn't be so pathetic and deserve only hatred, scorn and isolation. I deserve every bad word spoken to me. My mom let me rot in the homeless shelter for a reason. I feel like if I socialize, nobody will see a thing about me worth caring about. Speaking about how pathetic I am will let everyone on Saidit see how wrong I am, destroying my chance at making friends here. Better now than later.

    [–]lmaonope333 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

    lesbians in general are hated by both sides. I disagree with your support for Trump, and most Trump supporters that I've met are racist and sexist, but I don't think that people should be attacked for expressing a political belief, if someone disagrees with me I'd rather have a calm discussion about it

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)

    [deleted]

      [–]lmaonope333 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

      He's got more lgbt support than any other Republican president in history.

      citation needed

      [–]SailorMoon2020 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

      Dude, grow a back bone. How you gonna be a Trump supporter and sound like a punk on the internet? Take the red pill, go work out, get your mental and physical body in the right place and live your best life.

      You sounding so miserable and pathetic is probably why people are wanting to disassociate with you. That one male friend probably only deals with it in hopes of getting in your pants if he feeds you enough woes.

      [–]Aurelius[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

      My physical health is quite nice actually I look great. Male friend, what? I'm doing my best to stop being miserable and pathetic. Thank you for slapping sense into me. I'll try not to lash out when I'm feeling so hopeless. Sometimes it just feels like when I vent out loud, it makes zero difference at all. Any action I do makes no difference. I'm alone, speaking will make people hate me. I just feel so disrupted inside it starts to pour out, despite only causing snarls and bad looks when I start crying. I know nothing is really a paradise.

      [–]SailorMoon2020 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

      Get that mental health in order and you'll be smooth sailing!

      [–]Aurelius[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

      I'm doing my best. A year of DBT therapy twice a week that included one on one and group therapy. It's been closed lately. It brought be to Buddhism and Stoicism that are both very similar. Buddhism has really moved me, and I'm making strides towards it. I've also taken Psychadelics for it's mental health benefits, it's taken me from being desperately wanting to die to being more okay with living.

      But I still can't shake that no matter what I do, everyone will hate me. It gets so lonely. If I just keep practicing buddhism, maybe I can help other lesbians who are all alone like me.

      [–]Bananamoney 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

      Can I ask you why you support Trump?