I came across an account on twitter asking lesbians to post their comp-het crushes and women are posting pics of men they drool over. How do you all feel about this?

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[–]Poppy29252 36 insightful - 5 fun36 insightful - 4 fun37 insightful - 5 fun -  (1 child)

I feel like those women aren't lesbians.

[–]Elvira95 22 insightful - 12 fun22 insightful - 11 fun23 insightful - 12 fun -  (0 children)

Lots of lesbians aren't lesbians :D

[–]VioletRemi 27 insightful - 7 fun27 insightful - 6 fun28 insightful - 7 fun -  (2 children)

You know what most ironic in it?

Account seems to be "anti-lesbophobia". And in reality it is just lesbophobia.

[–]VioletRemi 23 insightful - 6 fun23 insightful - 5 fun24 insightful - 6 fun -  (1 child)

It even worse, I've checked their accounts and their site - it is mostly k-pop men or feminine men.

[–]Hydiee 30 insightful - 1 fun30 insightful - 0 fun31 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Looks like average age of those people is 17. Young, dumb genderists who think homosexuality is a fashion trend.

[–]SpatOuttheKoolaid 30 insightful - 1 fun30 insightful - 0 fun31 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Everyone is a "lesbian" these days except actual women who are exclusively sexually attracted to other actual women--then we become "bigots". Sounds like a bunch of maybe bisexual maybe women talking about men. =/

[–][deleted] 19 insightful - 3 fun19 insightful - 2 fun20 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

Gotta appreciate the double standards. Crush on a women? Lesbian! Crush on a man? Compulsory heterosexuality!

[–]Rubyredpython 18 insightful - 3 fun18 insightful - 2 fun19 insightful - 3 fun -  (1 child)

If they're drooling over men, they're definitely not lesbians.

[–]WildwoodFlower 18 insightful - 1 fun18 insightful - 0 fun19 insightful - 1 fun -  (12 children)

Shrug... I don't see how it's any different from gay men who adore Madonna, Cher, Judy Garland, Diana Ross, Britney Spears, Princess Diana, etc. Gay men don't usually call it a "crush" but it's pretty much the same thing.

[–]homosomes 22 insightful - 2 fun22 insightful - 1 fun23 insightful - 2 fun -  (4 children)

When they say crush, they mean crush. Look up literally any woman describing a "comphet crush" and you will see her describe a regular crush on men. It's bi women who read the comphet Google doc and convinced themselves they're a lesbian.

[–]WildwoodFlower 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Most of the ones I saw in that Twitter thread were teenagers with crushes on girly-looking K-pop stars. I don't know what that means as far as whether these kids are lesbians or bi or what. They'll figure it out eventually.

[–]Jillyjanejan 19 insightful - 1 fun19 insightful - 0 fun20 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Straight girls have always been known to go crazy over girly-looking men/boys for whatever reason. To be honest I think most of those teens are neither lesbian or bi, just straight. Like others have mentioned, it's a huge trend to be not straight these days.

[–]WildwoodFlower 10 insightful - 2 fun10 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

We are living in such a crazy world, aren't we? People who aren't lesbians are calling themselves lesbians while women who actually are lesbians are identifying as trans, genderqueer, or nonbinary.

[–]Rubyredpython 5 insightful - 2 fun5 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

This!

[–][deleted] 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I think I feel this way towards David Bowie, but I would never, ever say I have a crush on David Bowie. That'd be gross. He's like my pop culture dad (RIP, pops).

[–]WildwoodFlower 4 insightful - 3 fun4 insightful - 2 fun5 insightful - 3 fun -  (1 child)

For me, David Bowie always felt like someone I knew in a previous life. Or on another planet. There was this sense of "everyone thinks he's weird, everyone thinks I'm weird, but in some other time and place we would not be weird." But it was never sexual.

Does that make sense?

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Sure, if anyone transcends time and space, it's him.

[–]bbbarbican 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Gay men aren't sexually attracted/fantasizing about Madonna or Cher. That's the difference. These women are clearly genuinely attracted to men. Maybe a few of them are actually lesbians who are pretending to have a crush on a man to fit in but most are either straight or bisexual.

[–]WildwoodFlower 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I couldn't tell from the tweets if those "lesbians" were sexually fantasizing about those celebs, if they just thought those guys were cute, or if they want to be them because the straight girls at school like them. My main takeaway from those tweets is that those "lesbians" were very, very young. Or maybe very, very immature. I ended up thinking of them as girls rather than as women.

[–]bbbarbican 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Good point: they're young and dumb

[–][deleted] 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

wtf

[–]Lesbianvodkaaunt 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I feel like i’ve experienced comphet, but I wouldn’t call it a crush... more of a justification when i was younger to try and give men a chance. It didn’t work obviously. If you actually feel attracted to a man, it’s not comphet, you’re just bi. And its fine to be bi, but its not fine to use lesbians descriptors for our experiences when they don’t really apply to you. I assumed I liked men when I first started dating, every girl is supposed to like men and I didn’t hate them, so I figured I wasn’t a lesbian. It wasn’t until I actually started feeling attracted to girls that I realized that while I didn’t hate men, I didn’t want them in that way either. I feel like it can be fairly useful to explain why sometimes women try to date men, sometimes even for a long time, before realizing that they don’t actually feel any attraction to them. I typed way more than I meant to... I just really hate the appropriation of terms that only make sense in their original context.

[–][deleted] 15 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 0 fun16 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I agree with you. I think "comphet" as a concept has some validity and it probably explains why a lot of gay people, especially lesbians, start out having early heterosexual relationships before coming out. We start off assuming we're straight and that we'll eventually move past our feelings of disinterest or repulsion or whatever.

The way it gets used on LateBloomerLesbians and twitter though seems to justify being attracted to men as "comphet" - like it's some nefarious plot by men to make us drool over their ab muscles? Or, more realistically, their hairy backs and beer guts? I don't understand what's going on in these women's brains. It seems like they just genuinely feel attraction to men and blame society for forcing them to feel attracted, they're not passively going along with the expectations of heterosexuality despite not really feeling it, they're actually really feeling it but proclaiming homosexuality anyway. They're all crazy.

If this twitter was really about "comphet" the way I imagine true "comphet" is, it would be asking which celebrities lesbians pretended to have a crush on to fit in when they were younger, not which celebrities they actually had crushes on.

[–]UneedREM 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Bullshit

[–]FlanJam 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

In theory, if straight girls can have girl-crushes I guess lesbians can have "guy-crushes"... but like, I personally can't relate. The idea of gushing over a dude just seems so off putting to me.