What’s the worst thing that has ever happened to you?

submitted by [deleted] from self.Lesbians

I know that’s a super dark question, but I believe it can be really helpful and healing to share experiences like that to purge it. So if anyone wants to share feel free to.

The worst thing that ever happened to me was when I was 15. My “friend” and I were supposed to go to a movie and our parents would pick us up after it was over. Instead of going to the movie we met up with some people from our high school and started taking shots of 151 in this park. I got alcohol poison and passed out, they drove me back to the movie theater and left my body by a trash can. My mom shows up to pick me up from the movie and eventually after calling the “friends” parents finds me calls 911, I die in the ambulance, they revived me, and then I woke up eventually in the hospital. That was bad, but the coming weeks, months and years were actually worse.

Another kid at my high school went out with two of the same people who left me that night and that kid had the same thing happen to them. They were on school property when it happened though. So I had to stand in front of the honor council and tell them the entire story of what happened so they could decide if they were going to expel all of those kids involved. They were expelled and every “friend” I had bailed on me and wouldn’t speak to me. I was popular, a good athlete and a decent student and after that happened I realized all of it was fake and that I didn’t really have real friends or people I could actually trust.

That experience changed my life and even with a lot of therapy I’ve realized there are some things that can hurt and damage you so badly and it’s sad and awful, but after you talk about it and share it and do what you need to do to heal the only thing left that you can do is accept it and move forward with the hope that your future is going to be so much better than your bad past experiences that in the grand scheme of things will just be a blip on your radar and a distant memory. I really believe sharing is such a huge part of healing, and when we’re healed we all have the ability to help others heal in our own special way.

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[–][deleted] 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

A lot of things tbh. But here are the highlights lol - being sexually abused by my cousin as a kid - being constantly put between my cheating dad and neglectful mom - getting diagnosed with chronic disease - raped in college by someone who I thought was my friend - best friend died - found out a grandfather was a rapist and that's why my nanny I loved was fired - was stuck in a relationship with a narcissist for three years that destroyed me

But there have also been a lot of beautiful things in my life and I've been through a pretty amazing spiritual awakening. Worked on my perspective and crawled my way out of that hole to reach a place in life where I am truly thriving.

[–]Shales123 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I cannot pinpoint the one most traumatic moment in my life, or a before and after like in your case. I was born into a shitty family situation, so the trauma started at birth through ongoing abuse and neglect that continued until I moved away from my parents at 18

[–]MyLongestJourney 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

1.My father getting sick which lead to many years of poverty and practically daily horrible family infighting.

2.My father kicking me out of the house for being gay. Seriously fuck Pentecostals.

3.Me getting cancer at age 21.My then (much older...) girlfriend who swore she loved me,would never leave me etc (despite telling her it was ok for her to do so) dumped me some months in the treatment.I was neither shocked nor surprised.I could see through her from the start.Thankfully it was a treatable form and after 6 months of chemo,I went to full remission and I am still there almost 20 years later.

I am ok now by the way.Managed to not lose it and/or give up on life,held my shit together,got a good degree and a good job but the scars are there man.

[–]piylot 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I don't think of this as the worst thing that's ever happened to me but I had a similar (though thankfully not nearly as intense) experience of having friends - who I had many times partied with and dedicatedly looked out for- leave me in alone in a dangerous situation without any remorse when I accidentally became sick after drinking. It's been a few years but I definitely think of the whole experience (and ways I was treated during connected events, some of which more upsetting but too convoluted to get into) as a "before-and-after" in my life. That was partially because I had an abrupt change of losing my social group but also the harshness of realising that many (if not mostly all) people can and will abandon compassion at their own convenience. It inspired a cynicism I haven't fully been able to shake. The idea of committing to the belief that people are inherently good sounds attractive, but I feel that I'm continuously seeing evidence that contradicts that. I don't aspire to be cynical but it feels rational to me. I think I'll figure out a way of regarding and connecting with people that works for me eventually, through trial and error as always. In hindsight I'll figure out if the pessimism was something to move through and discard or something that plays a necessary role. For now, on the way there, I'm a little spiteful.

[–]PasLagardere 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

My mom dying on Christmas a year ago was probably the worst thing.

Second place would go to my first relationship with a girl when I was 19 and she was 25. She was abusive as hell and it took me a while to get over this.