Two smugglers are walking through the forest at night, taking care not to be heard amidst the leaves and branches, so as to not be caught.
Smuggler A: *whispered* Stop being so loud.
Smuggler B: *whispered* I'm not being loud!
Smuggler A: You're louder than me.
Smuggler B: You're not loud!
Smuggler A: I'm not loud. You're louder than not loud. Therefore, you're loud.
Smuggler B: That's preposterous! If—
A light is visible nearby.
What do we know about who's being loud, and who isn't?