I went into the kitchen and I forgot why I'm there.

submitted by [deleted] from self.help

Help.

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[–]fred_red_beans 4 insightful - 5 fun4 insightful - 4 fun5 insightful - 5 fun -  (7 children)

Whatever you do, don't piss in the sink, it's just kinda rude...

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 6 fun1 insightful - 5 fun2 insightful - 6 fun -  (6 children)

That ship has sailed.

[–]fred_red_beans 2 insightful - 5 fun2 insightful - 4 fun3 insightful - 5 fun -  (4 children)

aw man, the dishes are gonna smell funny again

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 4 fun1 insightful - 3 fun2 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

I have a funny story about that.

So... This woman, she occasionally picked fights, left her husband to be with other men, and then when things didn't work out she came back. She kept doing this.

Her son one day said to his father "everytime you kiss her it's like sucking all those guy's dicks." Figuratively he had a point. His father agreed and he moved on.

Kinda worked out for her, I think she married up financially but the new guy has weird sex tastes.

Kinda worked out for him too.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 3 fun1 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 3 fun -  (2 children)

So the marriage breaks up and they lease out the marital home to the child and he gets a coke dealer roomie and everything goes way better than you'd think things would go in that situation.

Except nobody wants to do the dishes. So they just sit there. Until one day they reek of death and are covered in maggots. So they just threw away all the plates.

[–]Node 2 insightful - 4 fun2 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 4 fun -  (1 child)

and are covered in maggots.

They stopped pissing in the sink, didn't they. That's how you get maggots.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Moral of the story

[–]Node 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

On rising seas.

[–]fschmidt 2 insightful - 3 fun2 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 3 fun -  (1 child)

To get another drink.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

That would be nice but no, camping again tomorrow, I have a purpose to stay sober. Also, I am just out of beer

[–]goobandit 1 insightful - 3 fun1 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 3 fun -  (1 child)

To point out Saidit’s massive censorship by certain admins maybe? Been awhile since someone brought it up...

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Has it been a while? I hear about it every day it seems like.