a little more background i guess? im a butch lesbian. we dated in high school. i probably shouldnt say her name but my ex goes by she/they pronouns. when she still identified as a guy we were pretty good friends (best friends?) despite her anger issues.

i live in a really conservative place and i really really trusted her. at this point i was a closeted lesbian and NOBODY knew. one day (when she still identified as a boy) she asked me out.

i told her then and there that i was a lesbian, and before i even got to finish she came out as a trans woman right there. she said, and i quote, "you love females so that means you'd love me if i was a female"

and being the stupid teenager i was i said yes. we dated for quite a while but the first red flag came when we had a date at the movie theater. we went to see detective pikachu when it first came out and when the movie was over she took me into the bathroom and wanted me to give her a blowjob. i IMMEDIATELY reacted negatively and was strongly against it. ultimately she didnt get what she wanted but she never let me live it down and told all her friends (who are a pretty liberal/lgbt friendly friendgroup) about how i was transphobic for not going down on her IN PUBLIC ON OUR FIRST DATE.

this "transphobia" thing became routine, if i didnt do what she wanted i was transphobic and EVERYONE had to know that i was emotionally abusive, reduced trans people to their genitals, etc.

i called it quits after about 1 year of dating and she still fucking creeps me out. we havent talked in ages but by god if i walk by she'll whip out her phone and take pictures of me, follow me around, etc.