House Bill 4260 would encourage men to remain "fully abstinent" and only allow the "occasional masturbatory emissions inside health care and medical facilities," which are described in the legislation as the best way to ensure men's health. Such an emission would be considered "an act against an unborn child, and failing to preserve the sanctity of life," according to the legislation.

  If this bill passes, then I'm predicting that someone is going to get wacked. /s