Guys - How bad is the dating world?

submitted by PencilPusher55 from self.whatever

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[–]Comatoast 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (10 children)

How is being the town bike the exciting life? I would think one would want to opt out of that, but I guess some people see freedom in it. I know that the modern shit involves being pro-sex, but I would wager there's a lot of women that seek out validation through sex, and if that's the case and you've actually found someone who makes you feel validated, wouldn't that change things?

[–]Chipit 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (9 children)

How is being the town bike the exciting life?

I can see you have little experience with such things.

Women who like a good time want new experiences, they want to party, they like to have sex with a lot of different men. How can such a person suddenly change and be content with a dull life in the suburbs? Spoiler alert: she doesn't.

[–]Comatoast 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (8 children)

Partying and promiscuity don't always occur together though. I don't know what your definition of ho is though, since it means different things for different people and there's lines drawn, numbers, etc.

I don't see why someone couldn't grow out of that lifestyle though. I stopped being interested in alcohol after hitting legal drinking age, so maybe that "excitement" could lose its thrill. I don't know why anyone would want to go through a smorgasbord of bad lays for fun though (I know it happens, it's just strange).

[–]Chipit 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (7 children)

Well, you're right and wrong. There are town bicycles who do get tired of the party/wild sex life. They then freeze out their poor sap husbands, and refuse to have sex with them after the children are born. Or worse, she cuckolds him and makes him raise another (better) man's children. Either way, the men are the losers. It's such a tragic situation.

Then there are the promiscuous women who have sex with a man who goes nuts that he finally got to have sex. Since she's got loose standards and all. He wifes her up as soon as possible, and she snickers behind his back as she can't believe her good fortune. She still likes to party, though. I screwed a bunch of these. I actually kind of got to like them, even though they're older. It's because you know they're not going to get overly attached if you make them a regular FWB. Single girls always start thinking about marriage after a few months.

[–]Comatoast 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (6 children)

Well, technically only the men who choose to be with women that are like that. I'm personally a fan (or was, I hope to never deal with dating bullshit again) of being extremely nosey about someone's personal sexual history before even considering them in a serious way.

I screwed a bunch of these

I never understood this. From your own definition, aren't you technically being promiscuous as well then? If you expect these behaviors from a long-term partner when you begin looking for one, shouldn't you hold yourself to the same rules lest it be hypocrisy?

[–]Chipit 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

I thought we were talking about the women? Suddenly making personal attacks on me?

Men and women have fundamentally different mating strategies: men want to spread their seed far and wide while women want to find a high-status man to care for her and her children. It's as unnatural for a woman to be a town bicycle as it is for a man to be celibate. Of course there are examples of both types, but both are equally ill-suited to marriage and childbirth.

[–]Comatoast 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

I didn't intend to attack you. I was using your quote for analysis and asking you how you felt about it, and why that wouldn't be considered hypocritical to judge someone else by a different set of standards that you don't uphold yourself to.

That said, I cannot agree. We are held to a certain extent to evolution and biological needs demonstrated within it. We're also smart enough to understand that men's seed is effectively being neutralized by various forms of birth control to ensure population balance. This in mind, the nature aspect of males seeking out as many partners as possible to spread their seed is no longer necessary. It's lost its original purpose (procreation) and is now replaced with pleasure seeking behavior nearly exclusively outside of it. Being aware of that, I don't believe that evolution can be used as an excuse to be promiscuous and that promiscuity from either sex is simply a way to further disease and trust issues amongst the population. We're aware of our actions and accountability is important for everyone.

[–]Chipit 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

It's not hypocrisy. Men and women are different. I can't believe I have to say this, but this is the world we live in where people deny it every day.

What do you mean, no longer necessary? Men are commanded by their nature to have sex with as many women as possible. Denying our nature is cruel and results in suffering. Why am I not surprised you're in favor of cruelty, as long as men are the victims?

[–]Comatoast 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Are you spreading your bountiful seed into the grateful loins of what are effectively cumdumpsters? Are you going back and providing for of all the children produced this way? Oh. Birth control? Right.

Look, if you were making the argument that you want to do this and that you enjoy being a bachelor, thumbs up. But you're judging women for behaving the same way while you benefit from it. Using evolution is a cheap cop out to continue damaging behavior. You're dismissing cognitive functioning abilities of modern humans.

I'm surprised that you're taking an emotional standpoint to something that I've approached with you on an extremely rational level. It's not cruelty to be consciously aware of your actions and not be subhuman filth.

[–]Chipit 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

But you're judging women for behaving the same way while you benefit from it. Using evolution is a cheap cop out to continue damaging behavior.

It's what we are. It's our nature. I came out of the closet as a heterosexual man and cannot deny who I am. It's very damaging to do so, as our advanced society knows well.

Always with the shaming language. Trying to make people feel bad for being what they are. What do we say when haters do this to gays?

You're dismissing cognitive functioning abilities of modern humans.

We are all cavemen. Damaging to whom? To deny our nature is damaging.

And now you've crossed the line into dehumanization. Way to go, you're now in the same boat with the Nazis. Literally.