Has anyone ever seen a TW in a mom group?

submitted by Tovasshi from self.GenderCritical

I'm in a lot of parenting groups. I've seen a couple of dads, some trans men, NB females, step parents, etc. but I've never seen a trans woman. Despite every group I'm in being inclusive, including the lesbian ones. I've never seen a trans women in there. I've seen trans wives in lesbian groups, but never the trans woman's spouse.

I know trans women parents in meat space, but I've never seen one in any of the parenting groups I'm in.

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[–]JustAMom 35 insightful - 15 fun35 insightful - 14 fun36 insightful - 15 fun -  (0 children)

I dont think I've seen any either. They probably don't have much time for child rearing. Thats a lot of work with no validation. Who has time to potty train and to perfect wing tip eyeliner?

[–]yishengqingwa666 39 insightful - 5 fun39 insightful - 4 fun40 insightful - 5 fun -  (0 children)

No, because they only want the fun sexy parts of their porn-sick idea of what women are.

[–]Agodachi 37 insightful - 3 fun37 insightful - 2 fun38 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

Interesting to see that female and male socialization is still at play here. From a young age girls are expected to have kids, partake in household duties (cooking, cleaning) and are usually the ones to look after their siblings. This is especially true in immigrant, traditional households like the one I grew up in. My brother had so much freedom and wasn't pressured as much as I was about dating/marriage, the expectation to have kids (my brother could say he didn't want to have kids and my family will just brush it off as whatever, when I said I didn't want to have kids- at the age of 15- they didn't say "oh you're young," no, they said "you're a girl and you must have kids."

Girls are expected to have families, make sacrifices for their families, even if that means giving up their dreams and passions. This is probably why you see trans men in family groups and no trans women. That female socialization is still ingrained in them. It's because they were raised based off of their sex, and it can be reflected in the behaviors and actions if trans men vs trans women.

[–]Feather 18 insightful - 2 fun18 insightful - 1 fun19 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Now that I think of it, I can't remember any either. Maybe I just wasn't paying attention. I do recall some transmen in various parenting groups I've been in. I've also seen several dads in online parenting groups. I can't specifically remember any transwomen/TiMs though.

[–]onemoredaydream 10 insightful - 3 fun10 insightful - 2 fun11 insightful - 3 fun -  (2 children)

I think they would find it very triggering, so I'm assuming they wouldn't want to be in the same space with people who would immediately call them out on them calling themselves a mother.

[–][deleted] 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Why would motherhood be triggering for them if they are women? No it’s because they are men and they don’t want to deal with the icky aspects of it like the actual social role women are forced into because of their sex.

[–]3MistersAndAMissy 6 insightful - 2 fun6 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

🙂 they don’t seem to mind pushing themselves into spaces about menstruation, etc.

[–]dazedandsubdued 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

nope

[–]EverythingIsHoney 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

It's because it's not "fun" Moms groups are full of child rearing, sleep training, why won't my toddler eat anything but french fries, my clothes are covered with drool, does anyone know when to register for school, how much do you pay for daycare REALNESS. You know what rarely shows up? Look at my new outfit!! I got to go and parrtayyy last night! Isn't my makeup totally rocking right now?! Check out my new purse I bought!!

What cosplaying woman wants to discuss the actual gritty, day to day life of being a woman with a child? That just ruins the whole damn fantasy doesn't it?

I mean they're "women" but not "those type" of women, you know, like real ones who actually need to deal with this stuff on a regular basis and don't just "opt in" to our gender that day....