Does anyone notice that trans people get defensive when you ask about how to interact with them?

submitted by chris3991m from self.TumblrInAction

I have gotten to know quite a few trans people on my campus. However, I never discussed transgenderism with them except basic acceptance. I remember though that one trans person said that they use "they/them" prononuns, and I thought it was "she/her". I asked them when I should use these pronouns, and they abruptly changed the subject. They started talking about their religious heritage instead.

I thought these people were the ones that state their pronouns all the time?

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[–]TitsAndWhiskeyPronoun: My Nigga 19 insightful - 3 fun19 insightful - 2 fun20 insightful - 3 fun -  (3 children)

Trans people get defensive about everything. The entire point of adopting a trans identity is to be oppressed and noticed.

[–]xoenix 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

The ones that aren't completely brain dead must be at least vaguely aware of the logical inconsistencies of their position. They are probably always on edge that someone will have a GC talking point that's difficult to refute.

[–]JulienMayfair 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

the logical inconsistencies of their position

That's part of the point. If they can force you to accept illogical positions for their benefit, it makes them feel powerful.

[–]chris3991m[S] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Makes sense lol

[–]jet199 10 insightful - 4 fun10 insightful - 3 fun11 insightful - 4 fun -  (4 children)

Just call them "my good man"

[–]noshore4me 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

"bro" also works

[–]LtGreenCo 5 insightful - 4 fun5 insightful - 3 fun6 insightful - 4 fun -  (1 child)

I prefer "you gigantic cross-dressing faggot"

[–]jet199 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

"Hun" is a good one because in trans circles it means a great hefty pornsick AGP who doesn't pass but we aren't supposed to know such things.

[–]chris3991m[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Sounds good

[–]SMCAB 9 insightful - 3 fun9 insightful - 2 fun10 insightful - 3 fun -  (13 children)

First, you don't know any trans people. You know some mentally ill people that 15 years ago would have been cutting their thighs.

Second. I can't help, I don't notice trans people.

[–]Node 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (12 children)

I saw two of them yesterday, with another 'something'. Walking right down the sidewalk in broad daylight.

[–]SMCAB 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (11 children)

It was more of a commentary on how a lot of these people aren't trans. They are sick and glommed on to a "finally" protected group of people where they can scream at you based on societal protection.

[–]Node 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (10 children)

Can't go into detail on this site, but there is a cure.

[–]Vulptexghost fox girl ^w^ 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (9 children)

I wish

[–]Node 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (8 children)

If you're familiar with the 'WPD' .co/.tv site, there's a section on self-curing. Not that I'd advise it.

[–]Vulptexghost fox girl ^w^ 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (7 children)

I'm not going on there because it's one of the rdrama sites, which my "twin" who I'm ultra-jealous of did 90% of the artwork for among other things (and it's all basically flawless).

[–]Node 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (6 children)

Ohhh, she's involved with those people? :(

[–]cqtzDon't censor my username 2 insightful - 3 fun2 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 3 fun -  (4 children)

Yeah, I am.

[–]Node 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Well, I've already forgotten what this comment thread was about, and it's going to stay that way. \o

[–]Musky༼⁠ ⁠つ⁠ ⁠◕⁠‿⁠◕⁠ ⁠༽⁠つ 🐈 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

I'm sure it's a lot of fun being the target of Vulptex's obsession. I hear about how wonderful you are all the time and I can't help but feel you probably don't appreciate that.

[–]Vulptexghost fox girl ^w^ 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Kind of. Not really.

[–]Musky༼⁠ ⁠つ⁠ ⁠◕⁠‿⁠◕⁠ ⁠༽⁠つ 🐈 7 insightful - 2 fun7 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

They adopt a victim identity, and it's all fun and games at first, being "stunning and brave" but the trappings of it, such as explaining pronouns, gets tedious. Like what happened with Demi Lovato.

Don't pander to their delusions, it doesn't help anyone.

[–]transbob 1 insightful - 4 fun1 insightful - 3 fun2 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

I didn't feel completely free until I removed that thing from between my legs.

Now I am free to be who I really am.

[–]AriShekelsteinDDS 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

If they actually answer your question, then they can’t shift goalposts on you and use stuff that was acceptable yesterday against you today. Takes all the fun out of it for them.

If I need an instruction manual in order to have a basic conversation with you, I’m just gonna not have any conversations with you.

[–]Q-Continuum-kin 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I haven't heard this used in a long time but 5-10 yrs ago they would just yell "it's not my job to educate you." Basically the same thing. I think now they've been smelling their own farts for so long that if you say or ask anything which isn't admiration and validation, it just doesn't compute in their minds.

[–]Femaleisnthateful 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I think it's secretive and incoherent by design. It's meant to keep you uncertain and insecure.

I have two female they/thems on my team. Both their email signatures say she/they. Previously everyone referred to them as 'she'. Then there was a team meeting that I missed and now it's exclusively 'they/them' even though their email signatures haven't changed. No explanation, and I don't ask. I just avoid.

Some people say you're expected to change up multiple pronouns, but it seems there's a distinct preference.

[–]jet199 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

So the actual answer to this is that they just make it up as they go along and there's nothing innate about it.

So you ask them a simple question and then they have to spin their mind back over all the lies they have told to work out which one they told you in particular.

[–]bucetao6969Ace Spectrum 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Mental blocks.

[–]clownworlddropout 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

It's not my job to educate you sweaty, do better. 💅