I believe that I am unable to bear this, what I've been doing for a small while, I've gotta 'effin change, understand what's right, what's better for me, I've always procrastinated, did meaningless things that only derange and slow me down, I think it is time for the better, I've always agitated this in me, never worked, I hope it works this time, because for fucks sake, how long will I drag myself down like a fucking moron, some things I may never reveal and drag it to the grave, let it be so, just I hope they never come to bite my ass right now.

I've always written shit like this, cryptic, diary-akin and so on and so forth, I sometimes do not understand why I write like this, it causes so much confusion for people, but honestly, if it makes me feel a bit better, then let it be so, I explain shit in 5-10 words to anyone with a query anyway.

I advise everyone to look at themselves, look what they're doing, how meaningful it is, how useful it is, how healthy both bodily and psychologically, time for change, time to move on and be something above.

It is hard to do imminent change, with time, with time all. I do believe everyone has gotten their life in a bigger mess due to the world collapsing on our heads, but it should never be the excuse to not live, there is no excuse to stop living, ever, no matter how hard you try, there's always an excuse to live.

Through hardship one lives, through hardship one dies. Never have I spoke my mind about problematic shit, I always solved everything myself, I always depended on myself, I never had anyone to depend on really, I had but a small fathoming of a person I could rely on, but I discovered them to be unreliable, someone who is dragging me down and saying that I am the problem, I am not. To each their own, but where does the line end?