all 11 comments

[–]haveanicedaytoo💗💜💙 23 insightful - 1 fun23 insightful - 0 fun24 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

1 - don't even mention what you are. It doesn't even matter. (Well, it matters to the people who will try to invalidate your opinions based on your ID, so fuck them. You don't owe them that information.)

2- sis, this is long. I wanted to read it, I was excited to read it, but even my eyes were glazing over, I couldn't get through the whole thing.

3- remember your audience. I don't know where you plan on sending this open letter to. If your readers are pre-disposed to siding with QT+ and disregarding anything a Terf-ette says, you're fucked. No ones going to read it, they're just going to gather around in a circle and wank on it. If your readers are pre-disposed to siding with LGB and Women with an E, then make it real easy for them, trim this down to no more than 1500-1750 words (and honestly, even less than that is better.)

4- It looks like they have a lot of race stuff going on, black, indigenous, latino, but the people who read this will try to twist the imaginary (hidden intentions behind your words) and make you sound like a "racist Karen" who hates black people or whatever. You going "here is another black thing, which is awesome!" isn't really helping, people are just going to be all "Nobody needs your approval, Becky." They will be looking for things to crucify you on, and this race thing will be super easy for them to do. You might want to consider not mentioning the race stuff at all, beyond saying something like "a very welcome diverse cultural enrichment of awkward euphemisms people say when they're trying to be performatively positive about race stuff like fucking voodoo that has fuck all to do with LGBT." But... yeah, in your own words. Don't single out the voodoo because "das wacist!~" unfortunately.

5 - I wouldn't focus on what-all is going on, especially because it's taking up a lot of space, I'd focus more on:

a) lack of LGB

b) lack of women who identify as womEn

c) do include those percentages you calculated.

d) consider using bullet points, especially to break up the wall-of-text feeling

Because we already established that this is a 7 day event, people will be able to do the math without you listing all the non-lgb/womEn events.

6 - you go off into a huge tangent about internet drama and terfs and whatnot. Again, I'd urge you to consider who's going to be reading this. Are these people fluent in tumblrese? I think of your thesis is "Pride MTL - gender identity vs sexual orientation - why can't we have both?" then you really need to tighten this open letter up, and cut out all the fat. The portion about internet stuff is really not needed.

7 - I think you might get more traction if you wrote this from the point of view of just a concerned citizen who is just innocently confused by the lack of LGB at pride, and the lack of E in womxyn, than as "I am TERF hear me roar!"

8 - I know you want to slay multiple dragons all at once with one open letter, but if you focus on these two points, I think you will have a better chance at getting heard by people who actually have the power to do something.

[–]bellatrixbells[S] 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Thank you so much for giving me this input ! I'm a literary student and aspiring author, so the tendency to go overboard is definitely sort of a "flaw" of mine in a get to the point context. That was definitely useful and I will work on it keeping those things in mind when doing so. Thank you very much again ! ❤️

[–]haveanicedaytoo💗💜💙 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Welcome! After you re-write it, I can look at it again if you want. But a warning, I'm very blunt and nit-picky and will most likely be like "Make it shorter!" no matter how short it already is.

[–]bellatrixbells[S] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Hahah oh no ! I'll try to Sum it up in one sentence like "trans are taking over pride, Do something !"

[–]indeepshadowsBi woman 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I read the whole thing and I'm glad you're pointing out the lack of LGB in LGBT. You're a good ally for doing this.

I'd leave out any reference to your own identity and focus less on pointing out that many of the events are centered on racial things. I'd also leave out everything that touches on the conflict between LGB and T; I fear they'd look at that and discard everything else you said.. These are clearly TRAs who've taken control of the event, and we know they can't be reasoned with, especially if they recognise you as someone who's their opponent.

Anyway, good luck with your letter. I'm glad you're doing this.

[–]bellatrixbells[S] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Why thank you ! I must say I obviously have an interest in doing it as a woman even though I'm not LGB... Through threatening you LGB guys, they're also threatening us (which includes you anyways it seems) and taking our place. But it still seems unfair and it pisses me off. I remember being a teen and having lesbian and also gay friends who struggled. I hate that their struggle is being shut down over imagined bigotry. I hate what the T are doing.

[–]bellatrixbells[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

You don't think it's too long ?

[–]cutenoobies 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Thats really really good. I am from montreal as well and over the last 3 years i have seen Fierte's effort for lesbian events and lesbian visibility has gone down. Good that you're doing this. Maybe reach out to a CTV or Global News too.

[–]bellatrixbells[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Thank-you ! You don't find it's too long ?

[–]3MistersAndAMissy 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I read the whole thing and thought it was really great !!

However, I’ve been called trus-m and t-rf before so I am not your audience.

It seems like haveanicedaytoo has a better idea of what needs to change!

[–]MarkJeffersonRaga Shave 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

This is a really nice write-up and I agree with what you have said here. Hope it turns some heads. My cynical gut reaction is though: Omg, Pride in these cities clearly has less and less to with those with same-sex attraction. It's showcasing mostly everything under the sun except for that. Maybe there should just be an LGB Pride. Maybe we should let TQ and Co. have their celebration of inclusiveness. I want off this Kwir boat.