LesbianIn case you were wondering, this is what it looks like to misappropriate a gay/lesbian "identity" as a solution to life's problems.

submitted by yousaythosethingsFind and Replace "gatekeeping" with "having boundaries" from reddit.com

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[–]Gearbeta 29 insightful - 2 fun29 insightful - 1 fun30 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Ugh. This woman is having a mid life crisis and what she really needs is a good friend to talk to, not to pretend she's a lesbian.

[–]julesburm1891 27 insightful - 3 fun27 insightful - 2 fun28 insightful - 3 fun -  (7 children)

...people do realize there’s a difference between being gay and blind right? You can recognize that someone is good-looking without wanting anything to do with them physically.

[–][deleted] 27 insightful - 2 fun27 insightful - 1 fun28 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

Exactly this. I am a gold star gay. But there are some women I could legitimately stare at all day. But I don't wanna jump their bones ever.

Stunning beauty is stunning beauty be it male or female. A work of art is always a work of art.

[–]julesburm1891 24 insightful - 1 fun24 insightful - 0 fun25 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I kind of thought the amount of gay men who work in women’s fashion might have clued people into this. Evidently not.

[–]LiterallyawomanTERF IRL 17 insightful - 5 fun17 insightful - 4 fun18 insightful - 5 fun -  (0 children)

Obviously gay men who like womens fashion are just undiscovered transwomen /s

[–]reluctant_commenter 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Well you just clued me in now. Thanks! I had not thought about that before haha.

[–]yousaythosethingsFind and Replace "gatekeeping" with "having boundaries"[S] 13 insightful - 3 fun13 insightful - 2 fun14 insightful - 3 fun -  (1 child)

Nah, that's why deep down everyone is really pansexual or in denial about it.

[–]MezozoicGayoldschool gay 5 insightful - 4 fun5 insightful - 3 fun6 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

Deep down, somewhere under the Earth core, in molten lava, where devil lives.

[–]oofreesouloo⚡super lesbian⚡ 11 insightful - 3 fun11 insightful - 2 fun12 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

That's too much logic for them lmao

[–]yousaythosethingsFind and Replace "gatekeeping" with "having boundaries"[S] 22 insightful - 4 fun22 insightful - 3 fun23 insightful - 4 fun -  (10 children)

As an actual late-bloomer, I am kind of on a mission to root out all of this gay misappropriation that I see rampant in places like r/latebloomerlesbians, r/actuallesbians, etc. Quite honestly this behavior harms actual LBLs like myself because people are going to think I'm like these self-deluded tourists and it trivializes the issues that actual gay, lesbian, and bisexual people face as a result of their same-sex attraction.

This mindset goes hand-in-hand with TQ ideology, which supports that people can identify in and out of sexual orientation and equates being gay or bisexual with being open-minded. It also mirrors TQ behavior and particularly Rapid-Onset Gender Dysphoria (ROGD) because it has these women trying to re-write their history to fit a narrative that is not theirs so that they can shoehorn themselves in based on stereotypes and turn being gay/lesbian/bisexual into an identity/feeling.

Anyway, this woman's post history is full of her questioning her sexual orientation as of less than three weeks ago based on the following:

I was on tiktok last week and my feed was full of hot women. I started thinking that I found them attractive and wondering what it meant.

I follow this girl on Instagram who recently came out as gay after having been in relationships with guys and their relationship looks so easy and happy and it made me jealous. I don't know if it made me jealous because she was with a woman or because she had found her soulmate.

She then spends apparently that whole day chattiing with women on dating apps and trying to convince herself she's so gay over the course of the next few days while talking about admitted physical attraction to men's bodies. She is clearly in a bad place, probably lonely AF during quarantine as a single mom to a young child, and wants an excuse for her failed relationships. What's missing? Uh the main thing that makes a woman a lesbian: exclusive, natural, and obvious sexual attraction to female bodies. She's worried she won't like vaginas. Like wtf.

[–]SeasideLimbs 24 insightful - 1 fun24 insightful - 0 fun25 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

Thank you! People are starting to realize that transtrending is a thing. But I see few people who realize gaytrending is a thing, too.

[–]oofreesouloo⚡super lesbian⚡ 19 insightful - 1 fun19 insightful - 0 fun20 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

I think people noticed the 'bisexual trend'. Suddenly lots of straight women were saying they were bi lol. But now, it's changing to lesbian/gay instead of bisexual and I agree with you, I really don't think people have realised it yet.

[–]LiterallyawomanTERF IRL 16 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 0 fun17 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

This happened in my highschool and college years- a friend actually confided in me her "goal" for the end of the year was to "become bisexual" and plenty other women who wanted to be "not like the other girls" were suddenly bi with no bi experiences or desires lol. Meanwhile I came out as bi and was socially outcast at my small cornfield college then fetishized by men to the point I never told anyone again (currently dating a man).

It's nothing new, except along with the teens trying to redefine themselves and redefine sex as they have since the beginning of time we have lots of emotionally stunted adults doing it to.

[–]reluctant_commenter 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Whoa, holy shit. I did not realize it was that bad. I thought people were just being hurtful by saying stuff like that.

I'm sorry you had so little support! Hope you're doing okay now.

[–]LiterallyawomanTERF IRL 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Thank you! Its been cool over the years to realize I had no reason to feel shame or feel isolated being bi. Though in this new TRA environment I don’t feel comfortable being openly bi either. I just keep to myself outside my closest loved ones about it.

[–]MezozoicGayoldschool gay 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I think it is because lesbian and gay words are redefined by gender ideologists as bisexuals, to a point when they are synonymous for outside-people who are checking UK/Canada news time to time.

[–]winterwillow 11 insightful - 2 fun11 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

Not related to this post (although I agree with you on this woman's motivations) but I just wanted to thank you for your posts/comments on latebloomerlesbians. I'm not technically a 'late bloomer', I realized my attraction to women at 15 and have no sexual or even romantic experience with men whatsoever, but homophobia/dysfunctional childhood kept me thinking I was bi and that I would get to dating men 'later', while exclusively dating/being interested in women. I guess my definition of bisexual was, 'I'm like everybody else and also attracted to women', not me being actually attracted to women AND men. I just assumed I was somehow. I never thought about men, I moved in gay circles in lesbian relationships, called myself queer instead of bi if a label was needed, because bi made it sound like I was interested in men. It's almost funny to think about in retrospect, denial is a powerful thing.

Anyways, in the beginning of this year I began to realize that this 'later' and a straight life would never come for me. I was assaulted by a man a couple of years ago, and reading about lesbians on lbl who were in ok relationship with men just made me very confused and caused me to blame myself even more. That it was just trauma and I should get over it. If even lesbians could marry a man, stay with him and 'be normal', surely I would be able to, I wasn't even a lesbian!

I didn't relate at all the masterdoc's ideas that you brought up, that lesbian love was easier (lol no) or cool or wishing I was a lesbian. If anything I wished I was straight! I never looked at my best friend in high school and thought we could be together if she weren't a girl, I just fell madly in love with her and she strung me along for years just to tell me she 'wasn't that way'. I also found truelesbians thankfully, and have now accepted that I'm a lesbian and have avoided all possible romantic/sexual connections with men not because I'm obnoxious, traumatized or want to be special (open-minded as you say), but because I'm not attracted to men at all.

I realize I come from a different perspective than you do, but thought I'd share. I see how a sub/checklists like that can be helpful, but it harbours a lot of misrepresentation too. I feel like lbl makes being a lesbian a choice and not only that, but a better choice, and it actually made me feel guilty for making that 'choice' without ever trying a man.

Good luck with your mission!

[–]VioletRemiCat, homosexual one 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I can't imagine how current generation girls and women are living with this transgender trends.

I am from USSR/Post-USSR, we had all homosexual information banned, no one know about it at all. When I was 18, I married on a man when I was trying to "fix myself" to become straight like everyone else. Ex-husband was great man, very supportive, very skillful in everything, very carrying and pretty handsome. However, nothing was working sexually or romantically wise. I tried my hardest, he tried to help as much as he can. And yet, nothing was working. And during romantic dates I was like "eeeeh, I guess flowers are nice". I just thought I am frigid and that is it. Later (after divorce) I slept with a woman and it was so much different, my blood was pumping, and my feelings were absolutely different, so I realized that I just love women and only women, and my mind can't change it, regardless of how much I will try to lie to myself.

And I can't think of me living with that right now. Now all info about homosexuality is easy accessible, but because of transgenders it is so twisted and confusing. What if after divorce I went reading reddit or PinkNews? And then find that "lesbians are living with men and happy"? I would start hating myself even more for "being wrong" and trying even more to be with men, and that will be just self-torture. Maybe I would even tried to transition to transmen if it all happened right now. After all I was cosplaying a boy (and later a goth boy) for years, cutting my hair very short, thinking it will make my life easier and will justify my sexuality at least somehow.

All this craze is so harmful for girls and young women, especially for lesbians who are nowadays so agressively misrepresented and forced to love girldicks.

[–]reluctant_commenter 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I guess my definition of bisexual was, 'I'm like everybody else and also attracted to women', not me being actually attracted to women AND men. I just assumed I was somehow. I never thought about men, I moved in gay circles in lesbian relationships, called myself queer instead of bi if a label was needed, because bi made it sound like I was interested in men. It's almost funny to think about in retrospect, denial is a powerful thing.

I was exactly like this too!! Wow. Only difference is I never called myself queer. But I definitely remember sitting there thinking: "I don't want to call myself bisexual because that implies I am into men.. but I am into women so I am definitely going to call myself bisexual!" Lol. The idea of calling myself lesbian didn't even occur to me for ages.

[–]CJLez 18 insightful - 4 fun18 insightful - 3 fun19 insightful - 4 fun -  (1 child)

I used to browse that sub back in the day - the thing about the women there is that I rarely saw people saying 'oh wow, I find a woman attractive, I might be bi, let me explore my feelings to see if I am bisexual or if I'm straight and just recognise the fact that some humans are aesthetically pleasing to look at' - 95% of them seemed to go directly from 'I'm 100% straighty-mc-straighterson' to 'oh wow, I find a woman attractive, I must be a lesbian.'

[–]yousaythosethingsFind and Replace "gatekeeping" with "having boundaries"[S] 8 insightful - 4 fun8 insightful - 3 fun9 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

Their truth > the truth.

[–]CrashCourse 14 insightful - 4 fun14 insightful - 3 fun15 insightful - 4 fun -  (2 children)

"A place for queer, gay, bi, pan, lesbian and questioning humans"

Nice to see the titular group get top billing in their own sub. Oh wait.

[–]yousaythosethingsFind and Replace "gatekeeping" with "having boundaries"[S] 7 insightful - 3 fun7 insightful - 2 fun8 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

They know their audience lol.

[–]MarkJeffersonTight defenses and we draw the line 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Yeah wtf

[–][deleted] 12 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I am really sick of these people. The first thing people who experience attraction to both sexes should consider is that maybe they are INTO BOTH? Heaven forbid. What a death sentence, to be a bisexual person. I don’t understand why they jump straight to gay. Most GAYS AND LESBIANS didn’t even jump straight to gay, but paid attention to our bodies. Being gay was a ticket to a beat down, nobody was trying to jump right there with the smallest blip of kissy feelings, most of us were horrified.

[–]thecandyman 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

Why would a a strieght person want to be lgb?

[–]Gearbeta 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I'm not defending this bullshit fyi. Its generally a problem with only women, but its because many straight women just do not like the baggage that can often come with straight relationships. Straight men who don't care about their partner in anyway are very common, many can be creepy and pushy, and even in perfectly fine relationships, there's cultural baggage like having to give up your last name, having your career not taken as seriously as your husband's, and you still doing most of the housework, childcare and having a full time job on top of that. So even though for women, dating a man is socially acceptable, it can come with a whole host of bullshit they don't want to put up with. But they don't want to be alone so they look to lesbian relationships as a way to escape this. Straight dudes can feel this way as well, but they tend to do things like MGTOW instead of calling themselves gay because being a gay man isn't cool whereas calling yourself a lesbian can be considered ok or not as detrimental. Also this relationship inequality is probably why you get "gay trans men" because its the same problem, straight women perceive or have experienced shitty straight dudes and think gay dudes are a better option so they pretend to be/fetishize gay men to attempt to get better partners

[–]Astrid2448 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

In addition to what gear said, again this is mostly a problem with women. Being part of the LGBT community grants an instant group of people that you belong to with no effort, a sense of victimization and drama (which is desirable now for some reason... I guess it’s fun when you’re not actually facing any consequences), and most importantly, it is very fetishized and not taken seriously. Straight and bi women are aware that lesbians are often assumed to be “waiting for the right man” and know that even if they meet the right guy later, people won’t really care. Whereas with a guy, being gay (or even bisexual) is seen as much more damning, so they don’t say anything unless they prefer men. Even if they were just bicurious and turn out to be straight, it will be an atomic bomb in all of their future relationships with women. Meanwhile, men will think its sexy that their girlfriend has an interest in women or has experimented. Add to this that it gives lonely, boring women (note that they are not boring because they’re straight, they’re just boring people) something to make them “unique” and give them an explanation for their issues, and you’ve got a recipe for a disaster.

[–]MezozoicGayoldschool gay 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Ask non-binary people.

[–]Beth-BR 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

I hate late bloomers lesbians. Like get over yourselfs. It's always women who think EVERYBODY cares about every little detail about them. They think they have some kind of responsibility to the world and that it would be SUCH a big deal. And the classic "I'm not a lesbian". I know such women and it just pains me to see them. No one fucking cares you're a lesbian just admit it it will be good for you. And it's women who are OBVIOUSLY gay (from a gay woman's perspective) Everybody takes their time but at a certain poit it's just pointless.

[–]yousaythosethingsFind and Replace "gatekeeping" with "having boundaries"[S] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I’m a late bloomer lesbian myself but we are being crowded out by the gaytrenders and LARPers going through a mid-life crisis, which is why they are so performative about it. The second they face adversity, you know they would drop the act.

[–]Beth-BR 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I'm sorry I just get frustrated over this. I really didn't mean to hate on anybody eventhough that's what I did. It's just that I see those women and all they want is men's approval and they play the 'cool' part instead of living their life. I don't know what has gotten into me and I'm really sorry if I hurt someone. I think I'm not mad at these women but at patriarchy becouse I can see why they act that way. It was wrong to burst out like that. I just wish more women had the ability to give the middle finger to the sociaty and live as they want.

[–]yousaythosethingsFind and Replace "gatekeeping" with "having boundaries"[S] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

No harm done. You’re right that there is rampant lesbian misappropriation and General off-putting attention-seeking behavior in the bunch. I wish more people called it out from the inside.